Sunday 12 January 2014

A letter to...

Yesterday the post on the fantastic Any Other Woman was about the Guardian series A Letter To, so I had a little browse. 

And I found this one.

I swear to God, it could have been written by me. 

M went on a date with someone else while we were still married, in the period when he told me he was moving out for a while because he needed a 'temporary break', before he had told me that it was over for good and we wouldn't be getting back together. I have no proof that he actually slept with anyone else though. Maybe others wouldn't see that as cheating. I do. 

This paragraph 'Three years ago, I decided I didn't want to turn into a bitter and vengeful person, so I've put a lot of work into trying to learn from this whole experience. I want to move on. I'm in a relationship now with a loving, honest and kind man. There are times when I feel like I can't trust him, yet he's never been untrustworthy. I realise that this is a legacy from you, a feeling I must shake off because it's unfair to him.' is exactly where I am right now. So true. The boy has thus far been remarkably tolerant despite my occasional episodes of letting-out-the-crazy. 

But despite all the bad, just as the end of the letter says, I feel like I just about retained my sanity and self respect at the end. Of that I am proud. 

Wednesday 1 January 2014

2013 - year in review

I feel quite guilty writing this because I’m aware that for a lot of people 2013 has not been a good year. But I’m going to say it anyway because I want to. 2013 has been one of my BEST YEARS EVER.
I missed most of the UK winter (which I really don’t like. I’m sorry to all of those people who go on about clear crisp days. All I ever notice is wind, rain and cold, cold, cold) by flying out to Thailand, Laos, Vietnam and Cambodia. Saw some amazing stuff, met some amazing people, reminded myself that there is more to life than my petty little world (not that my petty little world isn’t incredibly important to me, but, you know, there’s MORE OUT THERE). More on that here.

I came home in early March and enjoyed the UK spring, drank (and made) lots of gin at the Ginstitute, caught up with my fantastic friends and met some new ones. Some of the best are the lovely AOWettes, with whom I did Race for Life. Yes, you read that right. 2013 is the Year I Ran. Having always sworn I ‘couldn’t run’, I started running in April, ran 5k in blazing heat in Richmond Park in June and in September actually completed 10k around Regent’s Park. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

I spent July in South America. It was INTENSE. The animals, the jungle, the landscape. More here.

2013 was also the year I feel I finally started to 'get' social media. I was familiar with Facebook but 2013 saw me starting to use Twitter (with which I still have a love/hate relationship but I think it's now more love than hate), and best of all discovering a total OBSESSION with Instagram which I truly love. Thanks for putting up with my constant inane shots if you follow me there. 

August was wonderful. Lots of sunshine, eating, drinking, theatre and friends. Also lots of work, but ssh, we’re not going to focus on that.
In September my friend Saj sent me the unforgettable message ‘one of my school mates is divorced, cute and up for dating. He's an Oxford grad, did engineering but can hold a convo and is vv funny. Wanna know more?’ Yes, it seems that IS all it takes to impress me. We started emailing and met for the first time on 11th September. On a cold and rainy evening in Angel, it was a less momentous 9/11 than that which the Americans remember, but still pretty amazing for me.

My last big trip of the year was in late September, to enjoy sunshine and wonderful hospitality in Boston and New York with my cousins and their families. There were cousins, second cousins, cousins-in-law, you name it. And it was fantastic. On occasion, blood really is thicker than water. It was also a chance for a little bit of quality time with my dad, which is something I don’t always get enough of. We had a beautiful few days driving through the New England countryside to admire the fall colours in New Hampshire.




Since coming back in mid-October things have really been a blur, mainly wrapped up in working lots, eating and drinking lots and exercising less than I should have, some fantastic theatre, spending time with friends and, of course, with the new boy. I saw the year out on my balcony with prosecco, the fireworks over the London Eye and him. It was heaven.



(Was actually much better than this photo suggests, rubbish phone camera)

Happy 2014 to you all. I hope it is a happy, healthy and peaceful one. For me, I know it will be busy (work is already crazy) but will also bring some good things –hopefully trips to Sri Lanka, Paris, some more great theatre, more great times with friends. But really, if it is half as good as 2013 has been, I will have done all right.